Aria's Birth Story

I wanted to give some more detail on what happened exactly on the day that Aria was delivered.  Sorry if this is TOO many details, it's for my records as well.

I was scheduled on June 30th for a third trimester ultrasound.  I hadn't been expecting another ultrasound after the 20 week one, but apparently my doctor's office had started doing routine third trimester ultrasounds at some point from when I had Bennett 3 years ago.  It was scheduled for first thing in the morning, so I asked Michael if he wanted to come since ultrasounds are always fun.

At the ultrasound, the tech was a little worried for two main reasons:  My amniotic fluid levels were very low, and the baby's head was measuring 3 weeks ahead of schedule while the abdomen was measuring as less than 10th percentile.  I wasn't too worried about the fluid thing because we actually had that same problem with Bennett (he stopped growing around 35 weeks because of very low fluid levels so for the last few weeks I had to go to the hospital every few days for a repeat ultrasound and non-stress test, but he always performed brilliantly on the non-stress tests so they'd just monitor me for 20 minutes then send me home, and we induced at 39 weeks) and clearly he is just fine, although small.  The thing about the baby being not proportional kind of worried us though.  The tech explained that one possible side effect of the growth restriction is something called "head sparring" (I think??) where all the nutrients go to the head instead of being dispersed properly throughout the body, so maybe that was the cause.

I had my check-up with my doctor scheduled immediately after so he looked at the ultrasound results and decided to send us to the hospital for a repeat ultrasound.  His hope was that things weren't as questionable as they looked, and that maybe the baby was just sitting in a funny position or something and a repeat ultrasound would show better stats.  He also wanted us to do a NST (non-stress test) afterward.  The plan was we'd do repeat ultrasounds and NSTs every week until I was far enough along to induce, just like with Bennett.  So we weren't too worried yet since we'd been down this road before and figured it was probably nothing.  In fact I even told Michael as we headed to the hospital that he could go to work if he wanted since we hadn't anticipated the doctor's visit taking up so much time (we had taken 2 cars).  He said that he would feel better sticking around because he wouldn't be able to concentrate at work until he knew for sure that everything was fine.

At Orem Community Hospital, the repeat ultrasound did look a little better - while the baby's head was still measuring 3 weeks ahead, the rest of the body was measuring more on schedule.  Also my fluid levels, while still low, were closer to a normal range.  So we headed into a patient room for the NST.  Again I tried to convince Mike to go to work since the ultrasound had seemed fine but he insisted on sticking around.  The nurse got all my monitors started and I laid back hoping they'd send us away after 20 minutes like they always did with Bennett.  At that point I really didn't think anything would come of things and was mostly impatient because I also was planning to go to work afterward and I had a lot to get done.

I sent this picture to my mother-in-law and said something about how we were just sitting around bored waiting for the NST to run its course so that we could go.  What's funny about this picture is that you can see the monitor read-out in the background, and if we had understood what it meant, we wouldn't have been quite so bored.

We probably sat there for about 20 minutes before the nurse came in to update us.  We thought she was just going to say things looked good and we could go.  Instead she said that she didn't really like what the monitors were showing because the baby's heart rate kept dipping.  She had me turn from my back onto my side in case it was a simple fix like getting pressure off my spine, and left the room.  Another 20 minutes and she came in again.  She had sent the monitor strip to my doctor asking him to call her with how to proceed.  The baby's heart dips hadn't changed by having me switch positions.  Alongside with that, when the baby's heart rate was normal it was nearly flatlined, where they normally like to see more variations.

She promised to come back in once she heard back from the doctor.  At this point we were starting to get a little concerned, but were thinking the outcome would be something like I'd be coming back to the hospital to be rechecked every couple days instead of just weekly.  After all, I was only 34 weeks along, so it was way too early to do anything more, right??  Then the nurse came back in and said that my doctor was on the phone with the Maternal Fetal Medicine specialists down at Utah Valley Regional Medical Center so they could decide what to do with me.  I asked her if this kind of a thing meant I'd be coming back to the hospital for repeat tests every couple days.  She said "to be honest, I don't know if they'll even send you home like this since they can't monitor the baby at home"  I was super bummed because again, I didn't think they'd deliver the baby this early, so I was thinking she meant I'd be hospitalized for a few weeks until the baby was far enough along to deliver.

About a half hour later my doctor came in and said "okay, here's what's going on:  you're having this baby today."  He explained that between everything they were seeing, there were just too many things that they weren't comfortable with, and because they couldn't fit all of the weird things into one diagnosis, that made them even more nervous.  And because I was so early in the pregnancy, I wasn't dilated at all so if they induced me it would take most of the day before my body could respond enough.  He didn't want to put the baby through the stress of a long labor since the baby was already having a hard time.  Because of all these reasons, he strongly advised an emergency C-section.  I had always had such bad impressions of C-sections so I was getting really nervous, but I also felt like that was the right path for the baby.  I asked the doctor if we should go home and pack a bag and come back, and he said NO, that he wanted me to gown up and get wheeled across the hall and get baby out within half an hour.  That's when I started really freaking out.  We had 10 minutes to hurry and make a flurry of calls to our families and to our workplaces and arrange for how Bennett and our dogs would be cared for through the next few days.  By the time the nurse came in to start my IV and walk me across the hall I was shaking pretty badly from nerves.  It seemed like events were happening faster and faster as the day progressed so I was having a hard time processing.  They had mentioned that if the baby wasn't doing as well as they hoped, they would have to send it to the UVRMC NICU because they're better equipped, however the Orem NICU is 34+ weeks so we were hopeful that she could stay at Orem, that maybe she'd just need help breathing for a few days until her lungs developed more, and then we could take her home.

They took me across the hall to the C-section room and within 10 minutes were ready to go.  I was being such a big baby about everything - I was terrified of feeling any pain since I wasn't in any kind of pain since I wasn't in labor.  But the spinal was okay, and by the time Mike came in all gowned up I was pretty out of it.  Not sure if that's because of the drugs or if I was just in shock and mentally checking out.  From the time the doctor said "okay, here we go" to when they pulled the baby out took all of MAYBE 15 seconds.  Emergency C-section work for sure! We hadn't found out the gender beforehand, and the nurse had to prompt the doctor to tell me if it was a boy or girl because him and the assisting doctor were so distracted attending to the baby.  So I think he ended up saying something like "huh?  oh you want me to say? it's a girl!"  Suuuuuper anti-climactic after 7 months of not knowing.  Maybe it would have been different if it was a normal, joyful birth, but If we ever have another child I'm just going to find out the gender.  I had always explained my decision to not find out as "well, this baby has been a surprise since the very beginning, so we might as well be surprised from beginning to end" - I just wasn't anticipating having SO MANY surprises at the end, and not the good kind.  Aria was born at 1:19pm.  Her Apgar score was a 2.  They didn't do the normal weight/length because they were busy trying to get her to breathe, but later in the day when they checked her in at Primary Children's she was measured at some point and came in at 4 lbs 15 oz, and 16.7 inches long.

I don't remember things very clearly in the couple hours following the C-section - it's all kind of a blur.  I remember laying on the table while they finished up with me, and asking Michael if the baby was okay because she wasn't crying.  He said he thought so but he couldn't see her.  So I made him go see where she was in the room so that he could be near her.  She was surrounded by people trying to clean her up and help her breathe so he couldn't get close.  I don't know how long it was before they took her to the NICU - not more than a few minutes, I think, and as they started to run out they quick held her up for me to see, but since she wasn't breathing they were in a hurry and I only got to see her from across the room for like 2 seconds (which I'm fine with, I'm glad they were putting her needs first)  I got stitched up, transferred to another bed, and wheeled into my recovery room.  My doctor came in not long after to talk to us and to tell us that they needed to transfer the baby to Primary Children's (apparently Provo was full).  He said that the baby wasn't doing very well with her breathing, and also that they had noticed some visible skeletal deformities that led him to believe she had some type of dysplasia and that Primary Children's was better equipped to look into that and figure out what was wrong. We were shocked to hear that because we had no indication there were any problems from the many ultrasounds that had been done.  So now instead of just needing some help breathing for a few days, our new reality was that she would need help breathing until her lungs developed, plus she had a physical handicap that would impact her life.  My parents live in Orem so we called my dad who rushed over, and he and Michael were allowed into the NICU briefly to give her a blessing,

My doctor and nurse stayed with me until Primary Children's arrived very shortly after (via Life Flight - which alerted us to the gravity of the situation, since at first we'd been told they'd just send an ambulance).  Then Mike and I waited for over an hour while the Life Flight team got Aria all hooked up to their transport machine and ready for the helicopter ride.  Finally, they wheeled her into my room for about 2 minutes so that I could quickly see her before she left.  They opened the glass and I touched her, just kind of in shock, and then they left as quickly as they'd come.  We had debated having my dad run and get Bennett, who was at their house, so that he could also see Aria when they brought her to my room, but I'm so glad we didn't.  I was freaked out enough by seeing my baby in this huge contraption, I don't even know what Bennett would have thought.

After that Mike and I had about an hour to ourselves, so we got to work on picking out a name for the little miss.  We had kept a running list of possible names but of course hadn't narrowed it down yet.  We came down to 2 possible names, and were both leaning toward Aria, but we wanted to wait and see her again to make sure it felt right.  Primary Children's called to briefly confirm that Life Flight had arrived and that they would call again in a bit with an update.  Afterward Mike left to go home to pack us a hospital bag and see Bennett for a little bit, who was now back at our house with my sister.  By this time it was about 7pm.  My new nurse came in and brought all of the supplies so that I could try to pump some milk - she explained that I should start a pumping schedule right away and they would store it in the fridge, and each day Mike could take the milk up to Primary's for them to give to the baby.  Even though I had no problems nursing Bennett when he was born, I had my doubts this time since I was only about 6 hours from surgery and wasn't sure if my body had figured out yet that it wasn't still 34 weeks pregnant.  So I was shocked but pleased when I was able to pump about a teaspoon of colostrum.  Then I settled into bed to try to nap a bit.

Shortly after, I received what I will forever remember as "The Call" from Michael.  I was a little drowsy when I answered the phone, but quickly woke up as he explained that Primary Children's had just called him and had advised him to come up right away as they were very worried about the baby.  They had needed to start life-saving measures on her as her body was shutting down.  An initial scan had showed not only problems with her skeleton, but calcification in her brain as well which usually indicates some type of brain damage.  In addition, she was still not breathing on her own, and the left ventricle of her heart wasn't working.  There were multiple other problems as well but those were the biggest ones.  All things considered, they did not expect her to live the night.  Michael stopped by my hospital quickly to drop off a phone charger so he could call me when she passed away.  We also felt strongly that we should have him give her one of the ordinances in our church where he officially gives her a name and a blessing, so that she would be officially named before she passed.  I said to him "I think we should name her Aria" and he said "I agree" and that was it.  Then he was off to Primary Children's and I started my restless vigil through the night waiting for the worst call of my life.  In a 9 hour period we had gone from thinking we were in a healthy pregnancy, to thinking we had a child with a deformity, to expecting our child to die the same day as her birth.

I honestly don't think I could have made it through the night, and the rest of that long week, without my nurses at Orem Community Hospital.  They were amazing.  There were several that cried right alongside me and they always made sure to check on me much more than they were required to.

The call that night never came.  Instead, Michael came walking into my room at 6:30 the next morning.  He reported that, miraculously, the doctors had been able to stabilize Aria to a degree.  She was still 100% reliant on machines and medications to do her breathing and pump her heart for her, but for the moment she was still with us.  Her specialists had sent Michael to go be with me and promised to call the second she started to go downhill again.

The last 10 days since her birth have been a whirlwind of ups and downs, and I will describe some of those in a separate post.  For now I'll just leave you with one of the first pictures Mike took of our gorgeous girl.