I wanted to do something at Aria's funeral that would really stand out. Something beyond the normal musical numbers and balloon releases. I just didn't know what. . .
A few days before Aria passed away, a friend brought over a handful of gift bags that she had gathered from some of our mutual friends. Each one contained a little hair bow or head band. She explained that they all wanted to do something to help, and had thought of giving me some hair things for Aria. They knew that since she wasn't able to wear clothes, I tried to always keep something in her hair instead. She told me that I could pick my favorites and donate the rest to the NICU. I was so touched.
That memory came to me the afternoon Aria passed, as I sat caressing her lush dark locks for the last time. My mind started to wander. I had seen the hospital's collection of hair things, and wasn't super impressed. The hair clips all were so big and had a hard time staying in Aria's hair. If Aria's thick hair couldn't keep a clip in, what hope did a baby with normal hair have? I don't think there were even any headbands in the collection and I much preferred those to the clips since they were softer on her head. Plus, the hospital is not allowed to reuse any of the hair things once they have touched a baby's head. I comforted myself with the thought that I could at least help a couple of the babies by donating the hair things Aria hadn't had a chance to wear.
Then, it struck me. Why stop there? Startled by that sudden thought, I asked Aria's nurse what the NICU's hair bow collection was like and she answered "minimal." I asked her and Michael what they thought about the idea of asking for hair bow donations at Aria's funeral as a tribute to her, and they both were excited about the idea. So when we announced the details of Aria's memorial service, we included a plea to bring hair things to donate in lieu of flowers or cards. I emphasized the need for headbands in particular since not all the babies there are born with a head of hair like my Aria :)
On the day of the service, we set up a donation basket at the sign-in table, not quite sure what to expect. But boy did people deliver! The basket was overflowing! I am just so incredibly touched by the response we received to this request as part of Aria's legacy.
In the days following the service, a few more donations trickled in. My SIL and I spent a couple hours one day removing all the packaging, then measuring all the headbands and sorting them into gallon bags so that they were all organized nicely for the hospital. At final count, we had 224 headbands!! Plus probably around 100 little clips. Some of the hair things were too big to try to donate to NICU babies, but we just put those all into a bag to donate to the pediatric ward instead. There were so many cute things that little girls or even teenage girls would love to get during their hospital stay.
Yesterday we made the trek up to the hospital to drop off the hair things. We hadn't been there since the day Aria passed away 2 weeks before, so we were a little nervous to go. It was actually a great visit though, and there was a lot of NICU staff that recognized us and came over to catch up. One of the older nurses started crying when she heard about what we had done at the funeral with the hair things! She kept telling me how much that meant to them, and also what a beautiful tribute that was to Aria. Our primary nurses were both there and were excited to dig in to the stash as well. All in all a great visit.
THANK YOU to anyone who helped donate toward this project! It is something I want to do again in the future, once I hear the stash is running low again. I wish there was a better way for me to convey to you all how much all of this has meant - both to us, and to the hospital moms. There are going to be a lot of happy mommies! Life in the NICU is just so, so hard. Anything that can make it a little happier is just a lifesaver. I only wish I could see pictures of all those cute NICU babies in their stylish headbands!
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